Post by carcinoGeneticist on Mar 25, 2009 19:51:57 GMT -5
I figure now's as good a time as any to get this thread rolling, since the lady's on the way. :3 Sadie's a Queen of Diamonds, a Yarrow Mantis. Talk about being a feminist, really. Anyway. Give her questions! Make her sweat!
Here's her answers to the 100 questions for character development, for those interested:
1. What is your full name?: Sadie
2. Where and when were you born?: In the Yarrow. 27 years ago.
3. Who are/were your parents]: My mother was a Yarrow woman named Lotus. A Jack of Diamonds, and a gorgeous pine marten. She died shortly after my birth. Cancer. My father was also a Yarrow woman, Rosalee, a Ten of Diamonds. Everyone had thought that she was pure siamese cat who was simply gifted with the curious and ornamental mutation of antennae and damask-thin wings. They were foolish to make such assumptions, especially when it was public record that her great-great-great-great paternal grandfather was pure orchid mantis, like myself.
4. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?: I was one of five. The doctors said it was a wonder that my mother was able to carry us to term. I am relatively certain that it was the birthing and raising us that drained the last of her life. There was one boy. He was a born a 6, like myself, with no particularly interesting or redeeming features.. and was thus dealt with accordingly, thought not by my parents. My mother was too soft, and my father would never have gone against her wishes. So when I was old enough, I took care of it. The rest of us were girls. One was a pure feline, a nine. The other was a mix of feline and marten, a ten. Neither was particularly outstanding in any way. One was a pure marten, born a Jack. She was my parent's little princess.
5. Where do you live now, and with whom?: Right now, I am living in the Gardens, near Esterberry. I plan on leaving for the Court of Diamonds soon, however.
6. What is your occupation?: I am currently acting as the mayor of a small town on the outskirts of the Yarrow. It's... good work, but doesn't give me the kind of satisfaction I need from life. On the side, I breed Bandersnatches.
7. Write a full physical description of yourself.: In human form, I am 5'5". I've been told that I have a rather soft and feminine features in this shape - almond shaped eyes, and quite a curvy figure. My eyes are a vivid fuschia. In my bipedal and animal forms... I've been told I'm quite terrifying, which I tend to use to my advantage. Most people believe insects to be near-mythological, so seeing one as dangerous as a mantis can come as quite the shock.
8. To which social class do you belong?: Upper class. High upper.
9. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?: If I had any, I would not be willing to make them overly public.
10. Are you right- or left-handed?: Right handed, minorly ambidexterous. It was a skill that I trained myself at an early age. It makes it possible to do serveral things at once, even if my dominant hand is otherwise engaged.
11. What does your voice sound like?: Hm. On the deep side, for a woman, but not masculine - not in the slightest.
12. What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?: Interesting.
13. What do you have in your pockets?: Usually a pen. Sometimes, I carry my mother's necklace, just as a reminder.
14. Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?: Cracking my knuckles. I also have serious issues when it comes to dealing with most men. If they act, in any way, as if they are superior to me... I will not hesitate to put them in their place.
Part 2: Growing Up[/u]
15. How would you describe your childhood in general?: Busy. Noisy. Filled with people staring openly, sometimes trying to touch me as if they didn't believe I existed. Then I spent a fair amount of time trying to raise my rank.
16. What is your earliest memory?: Sitting on my mother's lap, She was so soft compared to me, but I remember her telling me that I was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.
17. How much schooling have you had?: I graduated from an Esterberry University. I couldn't get into one of the top schools because I am not an Esterberry, but I recived incredible education all the same.
18. Did you enjoy school?: Besides more of the same oogling and people giving me odd looks, I did. It was an amazing opportunity to prove my worth.
19. Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?: Wherever I was, I learned. After all, there was no sense wasting time. I learned how to act as a leader in school. I studied all of the realms and a fair amount of history. After I graduated, I studied the raising and breeding of Bandersnatches as well as studying magic to prepare for my eventual move to the Court.
20. While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them: I had a teacher during my primaries. She was gentle with her students, but wouldn't tolerate nonsense. She was a true diplomat, taking charge of situations in a way that would be impossible not to admire.
21. While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?: There was... tension for a long time after my mother's death, aggrivated by the death of my.. brother. Of course, Ella was the favorite child, so high ranking and the only thing left of my mother. We all clung to her, even I did, more than I'd care to admit... We all missed her. My father was a good, strong woman, but we could all tell she had a hard time looking at us without thinking about Lotus. Overall, I had and still have a good relationship with my sisters, though we don't talk much.
22. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?: I've always wanted to be a successful Bandersnatch breeder, respected in the same way as the Highland breeders. When I'd made that happen, I decided I wanted to serve in the courts. I've always been a bit of a leader.
23. As a child, what were your favorite activities?: My father had gotten me a Bandersnatch of my own when I was six. She was beautiful, with a lithe body that I'd been told was very rare. I loved her. She treated me without the falseness I sensed in others. She didn't care that I was an insect. I loved to spend time with her. It was also the beginning of my interest in boxing. Being physically active... It's wonderful.
24. As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?: The first glimpses of my personality showed early. I was stubborn as a child, ambitious, and eager to impress others. I didn't approve of special treatment, and I certainly never approved of men.
25. As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?: Yes, but not because of any reason other than what I am.
26. When and with whom was your first kiss?: When I was 14. I'm sure it doesn't really count, but Selma was my first "love". She was beautiful, a ferret with long and silky fur... She liked me for who I was, and not what I am. That was new. I think my appreciation of that feeling was what made me care so for her. She moved to the capital a year later. I haven't seen her since.
27. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?: No, I am not. I lost my virginity to a woman at 15. I was distraught when Selma left, and so the first girl who showed me any sort of affection... I jumped at the opportunity. She wasn't all that stunning, a waif of a dog with droopy jowls and sad eyes. I knew she just wanted me for the attention it would get her... But I couldn't bring myself to care. I just wanted someone. I was 18 when I bedded a man. He was... an Esterberry, feminine in build. He... Was an interesting case.
28. If you are a supernatural being (i.e. mage, werewolf, vampire), tell the story of how you became what you are or first learned of your own abilities. If you are just a normal human, describe any influences in your past that led you to do the things you do today: My biggest driving force was a desire to prove my worth. I wanted people to see me as a success rather than an oddity. I wanted to be looked on with awe and respect, not curiosity.
Part 3: Past Influences[/u]
29. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?: The most important event of my life... would be my breakup with Donalda. It wasn't until after she was out of my life that I was able to really live for myself and myself only. Before that, I was far too influenced by her wants and needs. I had to change my own life to better suit her. Disgusting, really.
30. Who has had the most influence on you?: Honestly, the people around me were such a strong driving force to succeed... I don't know if I could name one specific person, though all of my teachers in Esterberry were quite influential.
31. What do you consider your greatest achievement?: Breeding my own recognized strain of Bandersnatch that was eagerly accepted by the whole of Yarrow.. It was an incredible feeling.
32. What is your greatest regret?: ...I wish that things could have ended more easily between Donnie and I. It would make my life easier if I didn't have that particular shadow always hanging over me. It had to end, but...
33. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?: Breaking Donnie's harp. I was so angry, though, and it seemed that she cared more about that damn thing than she ever did about me. I couldn't control my own anger.
34. Do you have a criminal record of any kind?: ...I've got my share of skeletons in the closet, to be sure.
35. When was the time you were the most frightened?: I... after Donnie left, I found out that I was pregnant. I was so terrified - it was what I'd always wanted, but I'd wanted to have her at my side when they were born, wanted her to help me raise them. Sometimes... she really was the best thing in my life.
36. What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?: Telling my father that I'd actually bedded a man. It was... horribly awkward, but we were having a true heart-to-heart. I couldn't lie to her about it.
37. If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?: I never would have trusted Dyane's advice on a relationship. *wry smile* That would have kept all of the Donnie-nonsense from ever starting. I mean, I'm glad I'd met her, but.. We would have made better friends, in the long run.
38. What is your best memory?: Terrifying as it was, finding out I was pregnant. It was.. the first time after the breakup that I'd had something good come out of the relarionship and been able to see it.
39. What is your worst memory?: ...Two... two months after the doctors told me, when I could see the swelling of my own body, I found.. blood. In my clothing, in the toilet... everywhere. Everywhere. I went to the doctors. They told me... I was hemmoraging. I had to be hospitalized. My body had... spontaniously aborted, they told me. Something had gone wrong and they had died while still in my body.
Part 4: Beliefs And Opinions
40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?: I'm a realist. If something good is going to happen, I'll be happy. If things look grim, I accept it.
41. What is your greatest fear?: That I'll never find someone who'll love me... Like Donnie did. That would be the worst.
42. What are your religious views?: *smiles to herself* I do believe in Rabbits. Don't ask why. Otherwise, I'm fairly agnostic. I'd like to believe in a higher power.
43. What are your political views?: I believe that without a strong leading force, the masses will begin to crumble. It happened to the Spades, and... His Majesty Theofilus is a good leader, but he is gentle. Too gentle. The Diamonds are losing that which makes them the Fang.
44. What are your views on sex?: Great fun. Make sure you don't sleep with someone you wouldn't eat breakfast with, though, or you'll likely regret things terribly.
45. Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?: Killing is certainly acceptable in certain situations. As a leader, it is important to neutralize risks before they pose a real thread. And... men who disrespect women or treat them like property... Such a man doesn't deserve life.
46. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?: Abuse women, children, or animals. In the case of Aces, this is also true - they are such sad creatures, it seems unfair to do them harm. It is also unfair to their owners.
47. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?: I... don't know.
48. What do you believe makes a successful life?: Satisfaction. It's important to do something you love. If it means you have to be alone, then that's fine - as long as you're pleased with where you are in life. If you're not, something needs to change.
49. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings?: I don't wear my heart on my sleeve, if that's what you mean. Too many bad experiences with being too open, I've found.
50. Do you have any biases or prejudices?: Men. I tend to view them as a waste of space until they prove otherwise. I should probably give them more of a chance, but it's a bias I was born into and will likely never be able to shrug off.
51. Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?: I will never bow to the wishes of someone else if they go against my personal needs again. I spent far too long doing that, feeling too worried about what other people thought of me. I won't let myself be bothered by that ever again.
52. Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?: ...There is no one, not anymore.
Part 5: Relationships With Others
53. In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?: Politely, but at arm's distance. If someone earns my trust, then I'll get closer. I only have a few friends, but I'm very close to all of them. It takes quite a bit to get to that stage with me, though.
54. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?: Probably... I... I really don't know. Someone in my family...
55. Who is the person you respect the most, and why?: My father. She's been through so much, having to raise four children and deal with the heartbreak of losing her lifemate at the same time. We didn't make it easy on her, but she dealt admirably.
56. Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people: My best friend, even though she's a terrible bitch, would be Dyane. I've never met someone who could be so obnoxious and so likable all at once. She's always able to make me smile, and I appreciate that.
57. Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person: I'm single. I have bedmates, but no one who's more of an activity partner or a friend. I don't think I'm ready for more than that yet.
58. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened: I have been in love. It ended in tears and rage, followed by joy, followed by the deepest heartbreak I've ever felt. In other words, it was terrible.
59. What do you look for in a potential lover?: Someone who won't make a big deal about what I am. A woman, of course, someone who I can respect as well... Someone who won't use me.
60. How close are you to your family?: I still talk to my father from time to time. My sisters are all doing well for themselves, but I only hear from them rarely. It seems normal to me, we're all grown and living our own lives now.
61. Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?: No.
62. Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?: Probably... Dyane or my father. Maybe one of my sisters, depending on what sort of help I needed.
63. Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?: I need to be self-reliant.
64. If you died or went missing, who would miss you?: I'm sure my family would miss me. Dyane would, too, at least for a little while.
65. Who is the person you despise the most, and why?: Donnie. I just... I hate her so much, but I have so many good memories. It's such an inner conflict, I really don't know how to deal with it. It's easiest to just despise her utterly and not think on it more than that.
66. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?: I was the president of a debate club in school. I argue. I hate when arguments become... personal, though. It ruins the effectiveness of arguing to solve a problem.
67. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?: Oh yes. Very yes.
68. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?: It depends on the situation. If I'm leading them, or they see me as a person in charge, then yes. If it's more of a "freak-show" sort of situation, then I can't stand it.
69. Do you care what others think of you?: I try not to. I'm better than I was, anyway.
Part 6: Likes And Dislikes[/u]
70. What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes? Spending time with the Bandersnatches is one of the most fulfilling things I can imagine. The pups... It's so exciting to watch how they grow. I sometimes go out to shows. I love music. I'm also still boxing in my spare time.
71. What is your most treasured possession?: My mother's necklace. I'm also rather fond of my jacket - the fur that lines it is so soft, and I had to... work very hard to obtain it.
72. What is your favorite color?: Light blue.
73. What is your favorite food?: I like a wide variety of foods. I'm fond of seafood, however, especially shellfish. It's one of the excuses I can find to eat in my animal form. *grins slightly*
74. What, if anything, do you like to read?: Historical novels.
75. What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?: A cafe with music and poetry. It's got a certain charm that I've never been able to find anywhere else. It's the fastest way for me to relax.
76. Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?: I do not use, and I cannot tolorate it. Druge use, of any kind, is disgusting.
77. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?: Either at a show or at my home, with the Banders.
78. What makes you laugh?: Baby Bandersnatches. Dyane.
79. What, if anything, shocks or offends you?: Spousal abuse.
80. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?: *grins a little crookedly* call one of my friends over...
81. How do you deal with stress?: Finding a good distraction. If it gets too bad, I tend to take it out on something. It's a habit I need to try and break, and fast. It takes quite a bit to get me stressed, though. Boxing is a good outlet as well. It's a situation I'm allowed to punch something in.
82. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?: I need a plan. Without plans, things are more likely to fall apart, and if I have a plan I can usually figure out an alternative method of dealing with a situation. If the plan fails... Well, I make a new one.
83. What are your pet peeves?: Being stared at. Especially by men.
Part 7: Self Images And Etc.[/u]
84. Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?: I wake up slowly. I often set my alarm ahead so that I can hit the Snooze a few times before actually getting up. It makes waking up less jarring. Then I change to human form and care for the Banders. This is followed by tea and breakfast. If I can't do this routine, I can cope. I just prefer things this way.
85. What is your greatest strength as a person?: My individuality and desire for perfection in what I do.
86. What is your greatest weakness?: ...My desire for perfection in what others do.
87. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?: I would be more patient. And... maybe more trusting. Maybe.
88. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?: Introverted.
89. Are you generally organized or messy?: Very organized. It makes life much easier when I know where things are.
90. Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at: I am very good at being a leader. I'm able to distance myself enough to see a situation with a neutral eye. I have good skills with animals. I like to see myself as a writer as well. I'm not good at forming close bonds with people and tend to be mistrusting of the intentions of others. I'm quick to anger. I'm also... well. Not good at dealing with disappointment.
91. Do you like yourself?: I... yes. Of course I do.
92. What are your reasons for being an adventurer? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public?: I'm not an adventurer. I'm a politian.
93. What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?: I will become The Queen of Diamonds and return the glory our suit deserves. I'd also like to meet another insect
94. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?: *grins to herself*
95. If you could choose, how would you want to die?: Old, after living a full and happy life. Hopefully not alone.
96. If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left: Find someone qualified to take my place on the throne. Eat a rich meal. ...Apologize to Donnie.
97. What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?: Being a good and just leader.
98. What three words best describe your personality?: Intense, ambitious, shy.
99. What three words would others probably use to describe you?: ...Strange, cold, ambitious. At least we can agree on something.
100. If you could, what advice would you, the player, give to your character?: Open up a little. You've had a harsh life, no one can doubt that, but people won't realize that if you don't let them. You come across as rather harsh, even if you're actually just shy.
Here's her answers to the 100 questions for character development, for those interested:
1. What is your full name?: Sadie
2. Where and when were you born?: In the Yarrow. 27 years ago.
3. Who are/were your parents]: My mother was a Yarrow woman named Lotus. A Jack of Diamonds, and a gorgeous pine marten. She died shortly after my birth. Cancer. My father was also a Yarrow woman, Rosalee, a Ten of Diamonds. Everyone had thought that she was pure siamese cat who was simply gifted with the curious and ornamental mutation of antennae and damask-thin wings. They were foolish to make such assumptions, especially when it was public record that her great-great-great-great paternal grandfather was pure orchid mantis, like myself.
4. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?: I was one of five. The doctors said it was a wonder that my mother was able to carry us to term. I am relatively certain that it was the birthing and raising us that drained the last of her life. There was one boy. He was a born a 6, like myself, with no particularly interesting or redeeming features.. and was thus dealt with accordingly, thought not by my parents. My mother was too soft, and my father would never have gone against her wishes. So when I was old enough, I took care of it. The rest of us were girls. One was a pure feline, a nine. The other was a mix of feline and marten, a ten. Neither was particularly outstanding in any way. One was a pure marten, born a Jack. She was my parent's little princess.
5. Where do you live now, and with whom?: Right now, I am living in the Gardens, near Esterberry. I plan on leaving for the Court of Diamonds soon, however.
6. What is your occupation?: I am currently acting as the mayor of a small town on the outskirts of the Yarrow. It's... good work, but doesn't give me the kind of satisfaction I need from life. On the side, I breed Bandersnatches.
7. Write a full physical description of yourself.: In human form, I am 5'5". I've been told that I have a rather soft and feminine features in this shape - almond shaped eyes, and quite a curvy figure. My eyes are a vivid fuschia. In my bipedal and animal forms... I've been told I'm quite terrifying, which I tend to use to my advantage. Most people believe insects to be near-mythological, so seeing one as dangerous as a mantis can come as quite the shock.
8. To which social class do you belong?: Upper class. High upper.
9. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?: If I had any, I would not be willing to make them overly public.
10. Are you right- or left-handed?: Right handed, minorly ambidexterous. It was a skill that I trained myself at an early age. It makes it possible to do serveral things at once, even if my dominant hand is otherwise engaged.
11. What does your voice sound like?: Hm. On the deep side, for a woman, but not masculine - not in the slightest.
12. What words and/or phrases do you use very frequently?: Interesting.
13. What do you have in your pockets?: Usually a pen. Sometimes, I carry my mother's necklace, just as a reminder.
14. Do you have any quirks, strange mannerisms, annoying habits, or other defining characteristics?: Cracking my knuckles. I also have serious issues when it comes to dealing with most men. If they act, in any way, as if they are superior to me... I will not hesitate to put them in their place.
Part 2: Growing Up[/u]
15. How would you describe your childhood in general?: Busy. Noisy. Filled with people staring openly, sometimes trying to touch me as if they didn't believe I existed. Then I spent a fair amount of time trying to raise my rank.
16. What is your earliest memory?: Sitting on my mother's lap, She was so soft compared to me, but I remember her telling me that I was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.
17. How much schooling have you had?: I graduated from an Esterberry University. I couldn't get into one of the top schools because I am not an Esterberry, but I recived incredible education all the same.
18. Did you enjoy school?: Besides more of the same oogling and people giving me odd looks, I did. It was an amazing opportunity to prove my worth.
19. Where did you learn most of your skills and other abilities?: Wherever I was, I learned. After all, there was no sense wasting time. I learned how to act as a leader in school. I studied all of the realms and a fair amount of history. After I graduated, I studied the raising and breeding of Bandersnatches as well as studying magic to prepare for my eventual move to the Court.
20. While growing up, did you have any role models? If so, describe them: I had a teacher during my primaries. She was gentle with her students, but wouldn't tolerate nonsense. She was a true diplomat, taking charge of situations in a way that would be impossible not to admire.
21. While growing up, how did you get along with the other members of your family?: There was... tension for a long time after my mother's death, aggrivated by the death of my.. brother. Of course, Ella was the favorite child, so high ranking and the only thing left of my mother. We all clung to her, even I did, more than I'd care to admit... We all missed her. My father was a good, strong woman, but we could all tell she had a hard time looking at us without thinking about Lotus. Overall, I had and still have a good relationship with my sisters, though we don't talk much.
22. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?: I've always wanted to be a successful Bandersnatch breeder, respected in the same way as the Highland breeders. When I'd made that happen, I decided I wanted to serve in the courts. I've always been a bit of a leader.
23. As a child, what were your favorite activities?: My father had gotten me a Bandersnatch of my own when I was six. She was beautiful, with a lithe body that I'd been told was very rare. I loved her. She treated me without the falseness I sensed in others. She didn't care that I was an insect. I loved to spend time with her. It was also the beginning of my interest in boxing. Being physically active... It's wonderful.
24. As a child, what kinds of personality traits did you display?: The first glimpses of my personality showed early. I was stubborn as a child, ambitious, and eager to impress others. I didn't approve of special treatment, and I certainly never approved of men.
25. As a child, were you popular? Who were your friends, and what were they like?: Yes, but not because of any reason other than what I am.
26. When and with whom was your first kiss?: When I was 14. I'm sure it doesn't really count, but Selma was my first "love". She was beautiful, a ferret with long and silky fur... She liked me for who I was, and not what I am. That was new. I think my appreciation of that feeling was what made me care so for her. She moved to the capital a year later. I haven't seen her since.
27. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity?: No, I am not. I lost my virginity to a woman at 15. I was distraught when Selma left, and so the first girl who showed me any sort of affection... I jumped at the opportunity. She wasn't all that stunning, a waif of a dog with droopy jowls and sad eyes. I knew she just wanted me for the attention it would get her... But I couldn't bring myself to care. I just wanted someone. I was 18 when I bedded a man. He was... an Esterberry, feminine in build. He... Was an interesting case.
28. If you are a supernatural being (i.e. mage, werewolf, vampire), tell the story of how you became what you are or first learned of your own abilities. If you are just a normal human, describe any influences in your past that led you to do the things you do today: My biggest driving force was a desire to prove my worth. I wanted people to see me as a success rather than an oddity. I wanted to be looked on with awe and respect, not curiosity.
Part 3: Past Influences[/u]
29. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?: The most important event of my life... would be my breakup with Donalda. It wasn't until after she was out of my life that I was able to really live for myself and myself only. Before that, I was far too influenced by her wants and needs. I had to change my own life to better suit her. Disgusting, really.
30. Who has had the most influence on you?: Honestly, the people around me were such a strong driving force to succeed... I don't know if I could name one specific person, though all of my teachers in Esterberry were quite influential.
31. What do you consider your greatest achievement?: Breeding my own recognized strain of Bandersnatch that was eagerly accepted by the whole of Yarrow.. It was an incredible feeling.
32. What is your greatest regret?: ...I wish that things could have ended more easily between Donnie and I. It would make my life easier if I didn't have that particular shadow always hanging over me. It had to end, but...
33. What is the most evil thing you have ever done?: Breaking Donnie's harp. I was so angry, though, and it seemed that she cared more about that damn thing than she ever did about me. I couldn't control my own anger.
34. Do you have a criminal record of any kind?: ...I've got my share of skeletons in the closet, to be sure.
35. When was the time you were the most frightened?: I... after Donnie left, I found out that I was pregnant. I was so terrified - it was what I'd always wanted, but I'd wanted to have her at my side when they were born, wanted her to help me raise them. Sometimes... she really was the best thing in my life.
36. What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?: Telling my father that I'd actually bedded a man. It was... horribly awkward, but we were having a true heart-to-heart. I couldn't lie to her about it.
37. If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?: I never would have trusted Dyane's advice on a relationship. *wry smile* That would have kept all of the Donnie-nonsense from ever starting. I mean, I'm glad I'd met her, but.. We would have made better friends, in the long run.
38. What is your best memory?: Terrifying as it was, finding out I was pregnant. It was.. the first time after the breakup that I'd had something good come out of the relarionship and been able to see it.
39. What is your worst memory?: ...Two... two months after the doctors told me, when I could see the swelling of my own body, I found.. blood. In my clothing, in the toilet... everywhere. Everywhere. I went to the doctors. They told me... I was hemmoraging. I had to be hospitalized. My body had... spontaniously aborted, they told me. Something had gone wrong and they had died while still in my body.
Part 4: Beliefs And Opinions
40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic?: I'm a realist. If something good is going to happen, I'll be happy. If things look grim, I accept it.
41. What is your greatest fear?: That I'll never find someone who'll love me... Like Donnie did. That would be the worst.
42. What are your religious views?: *smiles to herself* I do believe in Rabbits. Don't ask why. Otherwise, I'm fairly agnostic. I'd like to believe in a higher power.
43. What are your political views?: I believe that without a strong leading force, the masses will begin to crumble. It happened to the Spades, and... His Majesty Theofilus is a good leader, but he is gentle. Too gentle. The Diamonds are losing that which makes them the Fang.
44. What are your views on sex?: Great fun. Make sure you don't sleep with someone you wouldn't eat breakfast with, though, or you'll likely regret things terribly.
45. Are you able to kill? Under what circumstances do you find killing to be acceptable or unacceptable?: Killing is certainly acceptable in certain situations. As a leader, it is important to neutralize risks before they pose a real thread. And... men who disrespect women or treat them like property... Such a man doesn't deserve life.
46. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do?: Abuse women, children, or animals. In the case of Aces, this is also true - they are such sad creatures, it seems unfair to do them harm. It is also unfair to their owners.
47. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love?: I... don't know.
48. What do you believe makes a successful life?: Satisfaction. It's important to do something you love. If it means you have to be alone, then that's fine - as long as you're pleased with where you are in life. If you're not, something needs to change.
49. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings?: I don't wear my heart on my sleeve, if that's what you mean. Too many bad experiences with being too open, I've found.
50. Do you have any biases or prejudices?: Men. I tend to view them as a waste of space until they prove otherwise. I should probably give them more of a chance, but it's a bias I was born into and will likely never be able to shrug off.
51. Is there anything you absolutely refuse to do under any circumstances? Why do you refuse to do it?: I will never bow to the wishes of someone else if they go against my personal needs again. I spent far too long doing that, feeling too worried about what other people thought of me. I won't let myself be bothered by that ever again.
52. Who or what, if anything, would you die for (or otherwise go to extremes for)?: ...There is no one, not anymore.
Part 5: Relationships With Others
53. In general, how do you treat others (politely, rudely, by keeping them at a distance, etc.)? Does your treatment of them change depending on how well you know them, and if so, how?: Politely, but at arm's distance. If someone earns my trust, then I'll get closer. I only have a few friends, but I'm very close to all of them. It takes quite a bit to get to that stage with me, though.
54. Who is the most important person in your life, and why?: Probably... I... I really don't know. Someone in my family...
55. Who is the person you respect the most, and why?: My father. She's been through so much, having to raise four children and deal with the heartbreak of losing her lifemate at the same time. We didn't make it easy on her, but she dealt admirably.
56. Who are your friends? Do you have a best friend? Describe these people: My best friend, even though she's a terrible bitch, would be Dyane. I've never met someone who could be so obnoxious and so likable all at once. She's always able to make me smile, and I appreciate that.
57. Do you have a spouse or significant other? If so, describe this person: I'm single. I have bedmates, but no one who's more of an activity partner or a friend. I don't think I'm ready for more than that yet.
58. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened: I have been in love. It ended in tears and rage, followed by joy, followed by the deepest heartbreak I've ever felt. In other words, it was terrible.
59. What do you look for in a potential lover?: Someone who won't make a big deal about what I am. A woman, of course, someone who I can respect as well... Someone who won't use me.
60. How close are you to your family?: I still talk to my father from time to time. My sisters are all doing well for themselves, but I only hear from them rarely. It seems normal to me, we're all grown and living our own lives now.
61. Have you started your own family? If so, describe them. If not, do you want to? Why or why not?: No.
62. Who would you turn to if you were in desperate need of help?: Probably... Dyane or my father. Maybe one of my sisters, depending on what sort of help I needed.
63. Do you trust anyone to protect you? Who, and why?: I need to be self-reliant.
64. If you died or went missing, who would miss you?: I'm sure my family would miss me. Dyane would, too, at least for a little while.
65. Who is the person you despise the most, and why?: Donnie. I just... I hate her so much, but I have so many good memories. It's such an inner conflict, I really don't know how to deal with it. It's easiest to just despise her utterly and not think on it more than that.
66. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict?: I was the president of a debate club in school. I argue. I hate when arguments become... personal, though. It ruins the effectiveness of arguing to solve a problem.
67. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations?: Oh yes. Very yes.
68. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? Why or why not?: It depends on the situation. If I'm leading them, or they see me as a person in charge, then yes. If it's more of a "freak-show" sort of situation, then I can't stand it.
69. Do you care what others think of you?: I try not to. I'm better than I was, anyway.
Part 6: Likes And Dislikes[/u]
70. What is/are your favorite hobbies and pastimes? Spending time with the Bandersnatches is one of the most fulfilling things I can imagine. The pups... It's so exciting to watch how they grow. I sometimes go out to shows. I love music. I'm also still boxing in my spare time.
71. What is your most treasured possession?: My mother's necklace. I'm also rather fond of my jacket - the fur that lines it is so soft, and I had to... work very hard to obtain it.
72. What is your favorite color?: Light blue.
73. What is your favorite food?: I like a wide variety of foods. I'm fond of seafood, however, especially shellfish. It's one of the excuses I can find to eat in my animal form. *grins slightly*
74. What, if anything, do you like to read?: Historical novels.
75. What is your idea of good entertainment (consider music, movies, art, etc.)?: A cafe with music and poetry. It's got a certain charm that I've never been able to find anywhere else. It's the fastest way for me to relax.
76. Do you smoke, drink, or use drugs? If so, why? Do you want to quit?: I do not use, and I cannot tolorate it. Druge use, of any kind, is disgusting.
77. How do you spend a typical Saturday night?: Either at a show or at my home, with the Banders.
78. What makes you laugh?: Baby Bandersnatches. Dyane.
79. What, if anything, shocks or offends you?: Spousal abuse.
80. What would you do if you had insomnia and had to find something to do to amuse yourself?: *grins a little crookedly* call one of my friends over...
81. How do you deal with stress?: Finding a good distraction. If it gets too bad, I tend to take it out on something. It's a habit I need to try and break, and fast. It takes quite a bit to get me stressed, though. Boxing is a good outlet as well. It's a situation I'm allowed to punch something in.
82. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan?: I need a plan. Without plans, things are more likely to fall apart, and if I have a plan I can usually figure out an alternative method of dealing with a situation. If the plan fails... Well, I make a new one.
83. What are your pet peeves?: Being stared at. Especially by men.
Part 7: Self Images And Etc.[/u]
84. Describe the routine of a normal day for you. How do you feel when this routine is disrupted?: I wake up slowly. I often set my alarm ahead so that I can hit the Snooze a few times before actually getting up. It makes waking up less jarring. Then I change to human form and care for the Banders. This is followed by tea and breakfast. If I can't do this routine, I can cope. I just prefer things this way.
85. What is your greatest strength as a person?: My individuality and desire for perfection in what I do.
86. What is your greatest weakness?: ...My desire for perfection in what others do.
87. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?: I would be more patient. And... maybe more trusting. Maybe.
88. Are you generally introverted or extroverted?: Introverted.
89. Are you generally organized or messy?: Very organized. It makes life much easier when I know where things are.
90. Name three things you consider yourself to be very good at, and three things you consider yourself to be very bad at: I am very good at being a leader. I'm able to distance myself enough to see a situation with a neutral eye. I have good skills with animals. I like to see myself as a writer as well. I'm not good at forming close bonds with people and tend to be mistrusting of the intentions of others. I'm quick to anger. I'm also... well. Not good at dealing with disappointment.
91. Do you like yourself?: I... yes. Of course I do.
92. What are your reasons for being an adventurer? Are your real reasons for doing this different than the ones you tell people in public?: I'm not an adventurer. I'm a politian.
93. What goal do you most want to accomplish in your lifetime?: I will become The Queen of Diamonds and return the glory our suit deserves. I'd also like to meet another insect
94. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?: *grins to herself*
95. If you could choose, how would you want to die?: Old, after living a full and happy life. Hopefully not alone.
96. If you knew you were going to die in 24 hours, name three things you would do in the time you had left: Find someone qualified to take my place on the throne. Eat a rich meal. ...Apologize to Donnie.
97. What is the one thing for which you would most like to be remembered after your death?: Being a good and just leader.
98. What three words best describe your personality?: Intense, ambitious, shy.
99. What three words would others probably use to describe you?: ...Strange, cold, ambitious. At least we can agree on something.
100. If you could, what advice would you, the player, give to your character?: Open up a little. You've had a harsh life, no one can doubt that, but people won't realize that if you don't let them. You come across as rather harsh, even if you're actually just shy.
