Self Esteem, Who Needs It {Closed}

[Nyx]

Alure hurried about the office, making sure that everything was just how she wanted it. It wouldn't do for her very first 'patient' to see just what a mess she tended to leave things in. Once everything was put away and the worst of the mess hidden in various closets she took a moment to take a calming breath. She was admitedly a bit nerveous. She hadn't been on her own for long, having just left her apprenticeship a few weeks ago and aquiring an office of her own. She found that she didn't need a lap like most of the Corvistowneians did. Her type of work was best preformed in a nice quiet office.

Today, she would be interviewing a little Yarrow mouse. Well, interviewing really wasn't the right word, more like studying. The mouse wasn't insane like the ones she was used to dealing with, just a bit. . .well damaged. All Alure could do was either help, or make the situation that much worse.

[Ry]

Slightly familiar now with the towne, Souris was better able to navigate the streets, although she still had to rely on the labeled mailboxes. She found the correct office now with considerably less difficulty, arriving at the door punctually, and knocked briskly, coolly ignoring the curious passerby, as she stood on the doorstep. She was still unused to being an unusual figure in Corvistowne, but she was no longer as self-conscious about her outstanding yellow, lilac and white points, and the accentuation her folded back ears made her distinctive in the towne.

She awaited the chemical Corvistowneian with outward composure. She'd heard that the rat was well-versed in the subtleties of the mind, making Alure d'Ssinssrigg the most appropriate selection to consult regarding her neurosis. Perhaps Alure would be able to heal the self-esteem that had taken such a drastic beating at her Mother's hands, she hoped. Otherwise she would never amount to anything more than her Suit permitted.

[Nyx]

The rat looked at the clock, then opened up the door, and noticed that the Yarrower was already there. She smiled and ushered the mouse in. Come right in, my dear. Once the female had cleared the door, she closed it, taking a quick look around the office to make sure that everything was in order. She saw a stray piece of paper on the floor and scurried over to pick it up and toss it in the garbage. She hadn't bothered to introduce herself, she was sure since the mouse had sought her out that no introduction from her was needed

She moved to sit behind her desk, climbing on the chair, then onto the desk actually. Not very business like, but without her bi-ped form there was little else she could do. She took a look at the notes on her desk, shuffling them around until she found the right ones. All the note had on it was the mouses name and that she had 'problems'. Well, wasn't that interesting. Now, tell me, what is it that I can do for you?" As she spoke, motioning for the mouse to sit on either the couch or the chair, her tail hit a small button on a tape recorder at the edge of the desk. Once she had hands she would be able to do away with the thing.

[Ry]

The mouse started slightly as the door opened, smiling back hesitantly as she entered,"Thank you," she answered uncertainly, jumping a little as the door almost closed on her butt. She hurriedly scurried further into the office, blinking as the pink and black rat picked up a piece of paper. She hadn't even introduced herself. The mouse smiled ruefully as the paper was tossed into the garbage. Not that she really needed the formalities.

The mouse cast about for a place to sit, as she began,"I think you can give me the help I need." Well, that was obvious, or she wouldn't be here. She was mentally and emotionally disturbed, but now that she was here, in the office, she found she didn't know where to start,"I-I'm just not sure where to begin." At the beginning, she supposed, but the story would be long. She was almost ashamed. Was she wrong to seek professional help?

[Nyx]

Alure watched as the little Yarrow mouse took a seat. She hated her furniture, so made a mental note to have it replaced as soon as she could. It didn't match, that bothered her. The couch was some weird puke green color with yellow flowers, the chair brown leather, worn to the threads in some places. Just as soon as she had a few prominant patients, she would have the money to furnish her office the way she liked, for now, she would have to deal with it the way it was.

She smiled as the mouse spoke, nodding at her indecision on where to start. Well, She looked down at the paper on her desk to get the Yarrowers name before she continued, Souris, starting at the beginning is good, but sometimes you need to start at the here and now and work back to the beginning. She had recently learned that the beginning didn't always work. Sometimes what the patient thought was the beginning really wasn't. Best to pick a problem and work back to find the source, then work on a way to resolve it.

[Ry]

Souris, battling her carefully hidden turmoil, drifted over to the well-worn armchair upholstered in brown leather, sitting down for a few minutes. Drowning in fearful uncertainty, she barely registered the smile the rat gave her, as she got up and went over to the couch, surfacing to heart-felt relief, the submerged the discomfort at the rat addressing her by name when neither had been formally introduced, as Alure gave her a place to begin that wasn't at the beginning.

She stared down at the peculiar green and dirty cream couch she reclined in, decorated with little yellow misshapen flowers, that could be buttercups, if you squinted hard, a complete mismatch for her fur. She took the time to gather her tattered composure together, which she patched with the open secrets and femininity unique to the Yarrow Gardens, turning the disturbing yellow orbs directly upon Alure, forthrightly admitting her problem to the rat,"A very wise doe once said, there is more to a person than gender, name, rank and region, and that there are few things less deceptive than the things you can see with your eyes. But I believed that gender, name, suit, rank and region define a person." She couldn't reconcile the doe's statement with her own upbringing, but Ophelia was a wise doe, and she'd begun to question her beliefs.

[Nyx]

Barely realized that she had never been formally introduced to Souris, since she had the mouses name in her books, she didn't really feel the need to dally with simple introductions, the rat much preferred to just jump into her sessions, feeling like there never really was enough time for her to hear everything that she needed, nor for her patients to get out everything that they needed to say. With unblinking silver eyes, she listened as the Yarrower started to describer her problem.

That is most interesting. Why is it that you think that ones being is defined by their name, rank and so on? Alure had heard that one before, but in different circumstances. It was almost like talking to her mother. She suppressed a shudder, adjusting herself so that she sat on her haunches in the middle of the table. Now what she needed to do was press Souris to elaberate on what she apparently saw as her base problem. Either that, or the rat was soon going to learn that her problems went much deeper than the Yarrower was willing to admit.

[Ry]

Souris considered carefully, struggling to decide how to elaborate. She found herself reluctant to bring up the complex internal dynamics in her family, but was quite unable to answer the rat without explaining the peculiar emphasis the Rosiers placed upon gender, name, suit, rank, and region. At once she felt torn, honor and loyalty warring with the pressing conviction that Alure needed a honest answer to be able to help.

"A name is an intimate possession," she began, hearing the words that had been repeated to her so often, as she carefully tried to frame her answer,"belonging only to you." She began, belief lending confidence and credibility to her statement. Her name, detestable though the meaning, was her most precious belonging. Souris, her mother had cried, upon discovering that she'd been the only surviving Card her father had whelped. Hopeful. But the damning Spade, and the low Three had killed that hope, swiftly. She quelled that thought, forcing herself to go on."Femininity is the next defining characteristic after the name," subtly referring to the strict preference prevalent throughout the Gardens. That had been the one sop to her pride, that she'd been born female, and pure Yarrow Gardens, when she could have so easily been otherwise.

"Region defines the appearance, and ingrained characteristics," the mouse stated doubtfully. She was native to the Yarrow Gardens, and she had accepted masculine company on more than one occasion. "Suit and rank determines the social standing," she nearly cried. The damning Spade she'd inherited from her father. "Hearts being at the highest end of the spectrum, and then Diamonds, preceding Spades", anguish and bitterness mingled in her voice,"ending in Clubs". Would that she'd been a Diamond, like her mother, and her grandmother!

"Rank further refining the spectrum."The only thing more damning than the Spade was the Five. She'd struggled long and hard, as a newborn, to avoid that, before increasing her rank the night she was born, to achieve the slightly more acceptable Seven.

[Nyx]

She listened, nodding her head every so often. Now, this was going to be an interesting case. She couldn't help but quirk a brow when she went down the list of suits and their ranks. Being a Club herself, she generally didn't care to much what suit or rank other people were, it just wasn't that important to her. Yes, your name is yours alone, but should not be considered your most intimate possession. It does not define who you are, neither do your suit, rank or gender.[/b] Alure was most curious to learn what had caused this notions to be drilled into the little mouses head. It seemed like she almost spoke like a recording, spouting off things that he been repeated to her over and over again.

Now, the region comment, I can almost agree with. Our appearance is defined by what particular region we come from, but what of those that are born to parents of two different realms? Sure usually you can pick out which regions their parents were from, but sometimes, that is not the case. But let's take this one thing at a time. You seem to have a particular hold on rank. Why is that so important to you?"[/b] Best to take it one thing at a time.

[Ry]

Souris balked at Alure's suggestion. Her name was had been her best, and only possession for so long, that she almost resented the rat's attempt to take her one consolation away from her. Her temper only cooled when she went on to repeat Ophelia's statement, that gender, suit and rank didn't define a person, reminding the mouse forcibly that Alure was, first and foremost, a Corvistowneian, and her specialty, the aspects of the mind.

"Not just the appearance,"she retorted immediately,"facets of our character are defined by the very quirks of our regions." She didn't know how to answer the question the rat posed, the only mixed realm she'd known about had been her birth father, and she'd brought about his death, she and the other stillborn children in his litter. So she let the question sit in her mind, and went onto the next.

Rank was a topic she was familiar with, and she answered, easily enough,"Because, I was hoping to make up for my suit", with complete honesty. With both rank and power, she'd be respected, and respectable.