Post by FlyingPanther on Nov 13, 2007 4:28:40 GMT -5
All Your Life
[/b]by Arielle 'FlyingPanther' Guthrie[/center]
Blackbird singing in the dead of night…
Lenore sat humming softly to herself, lying against a tree her sad eyes looking up at the star filled sky above. It was not a song known to anyone, not even to herself. There were no words, just the melody of whatever her heart seemed to want her to erupt through her tightly clenched beak. There was nothing about the song that was happy, but in a way, it wasn’t a melancholy tune either. It just, seemed to be. Something to pass the time and end the silence that surrounded her in the random bit of wilderness she was chained to. Chains chinked as she slowly repositioned herself against her tree that she was connected to, not liking the current position of lying back while sitting on her knees. She found there was no other way though, unless she wanted to sleep on the ground again, and have all sorts of creepy crawlies find their way into her feathers again.
It was bitterly cold, as it had been the last few nights she had been chained here. Her only salvation would be found in her wrapped arms and wings. She rubbed her upper arms feverishly underneath the wings, attempting to conduct some heat. But this night wouldn’t allow the warmth to last for long, and she sighed, a large cloud of white mist escaping her beak.
Lenore wondered how much longer Wulfram would be. This was the longest he had left her tethered in a while. Often times, he would just leave her tethered for a night, and be back in the morning to collect her. It had now been at least 2 or 3 nights however, she couldn’t remember for sure which. He had come for a moment or so in between, to give her more rations. She had been so pleased to see him, but there was fear in her now. How long did he wish to keep her here? A piece of her died each night she stayed attached to this tree without him near her. She knew why he was gone, which was probably the worst part about it. No matter what she did to show her fidelity to him, she knew he would never be able to reciprocate such things. Whoever he was with the past few nights, was obviously pleasing him greatly. She wondered if he would come back at all.
Take these broken wings and learn to fly…
Lenore had been ‘fortunate’. While her own rank didn’t reflect it entirely, she had been born into an extremely wealthy Torquehelmite family, almost among royalty, but not quite. She was born a human, something that kept her happily pampered within her family despite the disfiguring six upon the family name. She had been the only human born of her siblings, who had been born animals. Her parents, despite treating her as well as they possibly could, made it painfully obvious that if she had not been born a human, they might not have kept her, and that had her siblings not been born Jacks and 10s…they might not have kept the entire clutch. It was generally a bitter household, but still, because of her human form and her ability to grow in rank eventually, she was favored among her undesirable clutch.
Time seemed to fly, or at least, in this moment she couldn’t seem to remember the parts in between, and Lenore grew into a beautiful tail raven-haired beauty. It was then that her parents, like all Torquehelm parents finally gave her the bindings that she was to have for the rest of her life. Shackles had been fastened to her legs, along with two long chains. At the end of one of them, held a rather large and rustic lock. Her father held the key to the lock in front of her, and she pulled on the chains, clearly unhappy with the new arrangement. Her father was a stern man, keen on old ways and stubborn. There was no warmth in his eyes, as was usual for him. “Whoever holds this key, you must be wholly faithful to. No matter whom they are…no matter what they do…you must respect, obey, and be faithful to them. Do you understand?” he said, his dark mustache wagging ominously with his words. Lenore simply nodded. She had always been….afraid of her father.
It seemed only a week or so later that Lenore finally found out who would be in possession of the sparkling key upon the purple ribbon. He was introduced to her at a dinner that she had been told she had to attend by her father, in the large dining room with the very long ebony and impersonal table. The seats reminded her of her father’s face, pleasing to look at, but with coldness to them. They were ornamental, and hardly for sitting on.
She sat at the far end of the table, in the head seat. It made her quake slightly, wondering what was about to happen. She had never sat in that chair before, in all the times that she had eaten at this table with her family and their guests. Her father, she remembered, seemed perturbed, as their guests were late. He continued to glance at his watch, making growling noises every time he did so. His mother sat demurely, nearly expressionless next to him, reminding her and her siblings to sit up straight and proper every now and again, as violins and a string band played somewhere behind her. To pass the time, she watched her father, secretly amused with his grumblings, and occasionally turned to look at the fireplace that lay behind her parents, the only light source other then the various candles that lay about the vast room. Whatever the occasion was, she knew it was fancy.
Finally, the guests had arrived, two adult humans similarly dressed to her parents though adorned in white as her parents were oppositely adorned in black. They were obviously Tugleyans. Her father promptly stood, his earlier frustration melted, and suddenly (and quite frighteningly), his face grew glad as he strode over to the two, her mother in tow. She and her siblings waited at the table politely as her parents addressed the two adults and ushered them to the table all smiles and laughs. The spectacle was eerie. Unless there were guests, her parents never exhibited this behavior.
It was then that she saw him, as they pulled him out from behind them to introduce to her father and mother. He stood tall, with a strange amount of pride apparent in his stand and in his facial expression. Lenore was immediately intrigued, as her parents company never consisted of any children, or at least very rarely. She did not pay much attention to their talk, but merely watched them as they all found their seats. He was given a seat the opposite of her, at the other end of the needlessly long table. He stared back at her with intense red eyes. He was the first person to ever scare her more then her father. She was quick to look away.
At the end of the rather extravagant dinner, her father stood holding his wineglass high. All eyes were upon him. Lenore wondered what the announcement would be silently. “I would like to propose a toast, to Lenore,” he motioned with a hand to her, “and Wulfram,” he gestured again with his hand, but to the other at the end of the table, “And the life that they will now be sharing together. Let their coupling be fruitful and unbreakable!” he said with a large and bright smile.
Lenore’s eyes widened for a moment, shocked with the news. Coupling? You mean…like…being married? Like…being together??? Her siblings all whipped their heads toward her in equal amount of shock, but she did not see them in her dismay. She was too young for such a thing! She was only…what 12? And there he was! Staring at her from across the table, unwavering! She couldn’t be married to him! She was supposed to marry a knight in shining armor! She was supposed to fall madly in love and get whisked away upon a white horse! Right? That was what she was told from all the stories she was ever read. Why did her own marriage have to be so different?
“If I may be excused from the table.” She said standing, it was the only thing she had said all night in the company of her new family, and it was the last thing that she was going to say. She bowed without a word, not even waiting to actually gain permission to leave the table, before nearly running out of the dinning room. Once she was outside the dinning room she sprinted, ran as fast as her chained legs could carry her. But evidently not fast enough…
Suddenly she felt a firm hand clasp her wrist, and flinging her around to face him, was none other then her father. Her eyes were as red as Wulfram’s was naturally. His face was a new shade of purple that was so violent, Lenore nearly screamed in her terror. “What are you DOING?” he screamed. She cowered before the fury of her father, her eyes streaming with tears. “I DON’T WANT TO BE WITH HIM! I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHO HE IS! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?” she shouted back trying to pull away from her father’s painful grasp of her wrist. It only made matters worse.
Without warning, she found her head swimming, her face cocked to the side, and her cheek burning like fire. She touched her free hand to her slapped face, new tears welling in her eyes, but the pain was so intense she couldn’t make any noise even if she wanted to. This was the first time…she had ever been mistreated physically, and she didn’t know what to make of it. She looked wide-eyed and afraid at her father, whose expression hadn’t changed a bit from before. “IT IS NOT UP TO YOU IF YOU ARE WITH HIM OR NOT! YOU WERE NOT TOLD BECAUSE YOU HAD NO REASON TO BE. I HOLD THE KEY. YOU MUST DO AS I SAY! AND WHEN I GIVE THIS KEY TO WULFRAM, YOU MUST DO AS HE SAYS. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?” he whispered angrily to her, grabbing her roughly by both shoulders to the point where she was sure that they were now bruised, and shook her repeatedly. “Our family is in trouble! WE ARE IN DEPT. There is no money to our name! Not a single cent! This union will insure our families well being!” his angry tone took on a sad one, and for the first time, she saw a bit of tenderness in her father’s eyes. Maybe, his stern exterior…had really been the façade that she thought his smiles were. Maybe…he really did care for his family. Maybe he really did care for her. Maybe…that was why he was so angry. She didn’t understand. She was confused. With a single look her father had given her, he seemingly had crumbled her entire understanding of her family, and the way he ran it. What was this?
“If not for the oath to the key you made. Do it for your family!” he said sharply, returning at once to his stern and familiar face. Lenore was dumbfounded. She had simply nodded. However afraid she was of him before that moment, she grew more afraid, and more confused by him in that moment in time. He let her go, and she continued to run, though her course now changed from her room, to the outside gardens.
She sat herself down on a small stone bench that they had within an equally small and decorative labyrinth in the middle of the garden. The walls of the labyrinth were truly useless, only coming up to about mid-thigh. She sat on the bench, looking at the intricate pattern that it made in the small circular area it encompassed. Beyond it lay the many rose bushes and other flowers that their family kept. Her mother loved flowers, and the garden was huge. One might even venture to call it a botanical zoo. She sighed and looked up at the stars, twinkling without a care in the world, while she sat on earth, realizing that she truly had no choice in the matter. She was an oath breaker…and she ruined her family if she didn’t accept this fate of hers.
She heard a small rustling behind her, and with a swift turn of the head, met Wulfram’s gaze. She gasped a bit, and in the first motion she had seen him do all night, he held up a hand. “You to not vish to pe my viff?” he said, his accent peculiar, and not all together recognizable. She had never heard such an accent in her life up until this moment, and it took her a bit to process what he said. She looked down and away. The white boy seemed almost sad, as he had said it. “You vere promiset to me, ven ve vere wery small. My parents, they said I vod pe meetink the one I was to pe vit for the rest of my liff tonikht. I vas….not happy…es it seemss…you are also not happy.” He sat next to her on the bench, but she turned away, not wanting to look at him.
He sighed a bit loudly, before he continued, “Put ven I saw you, I could not help put notice ho peautiful you vere, und I could not stop lookink.” He watched for her reaction, but Lenore didn’t look at him, there was a small silence before she spoke, “Yeah, I noticed.” She said, though she couldn’t tell herself weather she was pleased or annoyed. Wulfram simply laughed. It was a deep laugh, even for a child. She looked at him finally, and he gave her a small smile. Finally she cracked a small smile as well. At least, they both seemed to not like the arrangement too much.
All your life…
As time progressed, they had slowly but surely found love within the relationship that was set up for them, beyond both of their wildest imaginations. Lenore secretly thanked the opportunity, though she had not when she was little. She knew she would have never met Wulfram, and found her true love if not for that arrangement. It was almost strange, how it all turned out for the better. Wulfram was charming, funny, and as he grew into adulthood, drop dead gorgeous. She laughed at the notion that at one point she was so ready to throw the chance away.
But with the good, also came the bad. The more Lenore got to know her beloved mate, the more bad she had seen. He often took advantage of her oath to the key to control her, and make her do things that he wanted. He had a wandering eye, that left her alone in bed, and him within another’s for days on end, to the point where she could not remember the last time he had shared his bed with her, and her alone. He had grown paranoid, for she was indeed beautiful, and gave her a new binding in the form of a nose ring chain, so that he could leash her around like a dog, to make sure she didn’t stray far from his side, and cut her beautiful long raven hair to ribbons, so that she would be less appealing to others that passed her by. She would be his and his alone.
And so she sat tied to a tree, not unlike others she had been tied to in the past, waiting for him to come back and claim her. For him to envelope her in his arms and tell her how much he loved her, like he used to. Tell her how beautiful he was to her, like he used to so long ago. Tell her that she was his world, like he used to. So long ago it was when last he did these things. So long ago when she was the only one in his life, when she was the one that had made him happy. She wondered what she had done to change his feelings for her. What she had done to have him distance himself so much from her. She loved him, and she knew that he did to. He did, even if he didn’t show it the way she wished, or as often as she would like. On rare occasions, he would do things that affirmed her beliefs of his love for her. She lived for them.
She lived for the past, that while she spent her several nights here tied to this tree, she began to doubt would ever reemerge. She had realized long ago, that she could use the talons on her hands to pick the lock. She had known for some time. But the key oath had kept her from trying, as well as her love for her mate. She knew he would be furious if he ever came back and she wasn’t there. She knew that he would never be able to forgive her for leaving him. She loved him too much to leave him. But more and more, as she sat under the stars that reminded her of their first time alone, she wondered if it could ever be like that again. She wondered if he would even come back.
She looked at the large lock that kept her tied to the tree. Had it been any other time, she would have looked away in shame at the very thought. Now the lock seemed to promise so much, if she could only pick it. She could be free from his tyrannical ways. She could be free to grow her hair long and beautiful again. She could be free from the fear that he made her feel at times. She could be free from so much.
You were only waiting for this moment to arise!
Blackbird fly! Blackbird fly!
Into the light of the dark black night!
Blackbird fly! Blackbird fly!
Into the light of the dark black night!
Her hands reached for the lock with a new determination. Sticking a sharp talon in the lock, she began to slowly move it around, attempting to pick at it. The first time she tried, her talon broke off a bit, making her caw a bit in pain. But she couldn’t give up. She could have freedom! It could be hers! If she only tried a bit harder! She tried more feverishly this time, and found success in the form of the thick click she had come to know when only Wulfram untied her. She was free! She laughed, tears streaming from her eyes with excitement! Freedom! She stood up and danced around, laughing all the while. She began to walk away from the tree she was formerly imprisoned by, nearly skipping.
She could finally start a new life! She could……find a new love…..
Then she stopped just as suddenly as she had started away. She looked down at the lock she had undone, the tree she had been chained to, and ahead of her. She could find a new love. She sighed with the realization, that even though Wulfram treated her badly, even though he made her feel like shit now, it had not always been that way. Something had happened to turn their relationship sour. Maybe it was something she herself had done. Whatever it was, it could be fixed. Despite how awful he treated her, her love and her fidelity would always and forever lie with him. Even if the days of old never came back, and they only stayed a distant memory, she never wanted them tainted by an experience with someone else. There would be no new love. Love was Wulfram.
She looked back at the tree, old weights finding their old places upon her shoulders as she headed back. She sat down with a bit of a thud; not even attempting to get comfortable anymore, and slowly wrapped the chains around the trunk of the tree. She counted the links the way Wulfram usually did, until she came to the fifth one, and hooked the lock through both links. She stared at it for a while. Was she sure? She could still get away…It was not to late…
Chink.
Black bird singing in the dead of night…
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see!
All your life,
You were only waiting for this moment to be free…
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see!
All your life,
You were only waiting for this moment to be free…
