The Last Night of Sadness (Ended!)

[carcinoGeneticist]

Asha, as she had become in such a short time, squealed at the kiss, continuing to paw at the man gleefully. She liked him already. He smelled nice, and his funny skin was so smooth! His voice, to her ears, was also soothing in a way. With all the tumbling around that happened before, his arms were delightful, and she started in kneading at his chest.

Surely he would feed her, right?

Watching this little show of affection, Calia smiled again. It was fuller this time, still sad, but more true. "Hope,[/b]" she repeated softly. It was a sad name, but... She was, in her silly and colorful way, everything their family needed. They needed her, and they needed hope. "It really is perfect.[/b]" as she folded the little girl into her arms, she reached up to tickle softly under the little chin. There was a bottle of warmed milk set on the dresser by the nurse before her rapid departure, and Calia took it, offering it to the skunk. This was different. Her other children never needed milk of any kind, but Asha took it eagerly.

Calia looked up at Theofilus, her expression sad. "I want to help you with your burdens, my love. You carry too much weight.[/b]" the words were soft but earnest, and she slowly reached out to touch his hand. This time, at least, the gesture did not feel empty. He needed her to be strong for him now, especially now when so many things seemed to be up in the air. She took a deep breath, squeezing his hand in her own. It was strange, having him in this form. His hand felt so slight within her own, which was not something that she felt often. He almost felt weak in this moment. "If you're ready to tell me, then I'm ready to listen.[/b]" Asha seemed completely settled in, sucking at the bottle eagerly and kneading at it with her little paws.

[Kari Muffin]

Theofilus really hadn't thought about being in his human form until Calia squeezed his hand. It was so very obvious how slight, awkward and lankly he really was. In the courts he often got looks when he wasn't in his human form. Now seemed like the appropriate time to shift.

He looked to Calia with a sad expression. Did he really carry too much weight? She seemed to be carrying more than him. He felt bad to make her worry so, because he knew he was part of the problem. He closed his eyes for a moment before explaining, his feathers bristled with his discomfort.

"My brother was an Ace. He was my only friend and I was his only friend. Then he drowned. I don't really know how, but I just saw him drown because I couldn't swim out to safe him. My mother denies that he ever existed." Theofilus choked, "She did horrible things to him while my father wasn't home. I just... that's why I want the family to be happy. It doesn't matter if Asha is an Ace or not. I want her to be happy. She deserves to be."

He took in a sharp breath. Why did it hurt so much to speak about the truth? Why did this whole ordeal hurt?

[carcinoGeneticist]

The weight of his bipedal form's talons resting in her own was a relief. She couldn't quite explain why, but the strength that she could feel within them made her feel stronger. Reassured by that strength, Calia clung tighter to him, willing some of her own strength into his. He needed it now. She gently squeezed his hand, offering him all the comfort that was hers to give.

Her expression should answer all of his questions. As much work as she put into keeping things running smoothly both at home and at her job, Theofilus was the backbone to the entire family - even to those not blood related. She didn't know how he was able to maintain the amount of effort that he did. She would have collapsed in a heartbeat.

Calia listened to him quietly, letting his words sink in fully. She didn't know what to say. How could she say anything that could fully encompass what he had just told her? Instead, she simply reached out to him, pulling him to her in a firm hug. Asha squealed happily as she was surrounded by the two, snuggling into the middle of the hug. "You loved him, Theofilus, but you were just a boy. You did all that you could, and you can't blame yourself. He... He was lucky to have a brother like you.[/b]" Calia whispered against his neck, gently stroking the back of his head. If he broke down, she was here. She'd always be here. "It's different now. You've grown, you have more influence... And Asha is your daughter, too. She has us, and we have her. She has a full family who will love her... Unconditionally.[/b]"

She couldn't stand the pain in his voice, in that little choke and gasp. Asha, oblivious to the pain in the room, continued to make her happy little noises, grabbing at the silky feathers of both sparrows. Her family. It was all hers.

[Kari Muffin]

He hugged her back. For a long while he didn't say anything, because he simply couldn't. Theofilus didn't want to break down crying. It just wouldn't solve anything right now. He simpled hugged her until he managed to find his words again.

"I'm sorry," was the first thing he muttered as he let go of her. He place a hand lightly on Asha's head before pacing his hand on Calia's once again. "This is the worst time to have a break down I suppose. I'm trying my hardest with Eilwyn but it's not like I can fix four years of damage because of the Lowlands. I suppose for a while things are going to remain difficult. I'll do my best to be there when you call, but I might have to take a break for a short while." He shook his head, filled with dismay.

He was slowly breaking down, and before he shattered he needed to get away when he had the chance. "I'm still not strong enough to go home. I haven't seen the lake where my brother died since that day. I haven't seen my parents since I left home to become an accountant. I'm just not strong enough right now for you, and I'm sorry."

[carcinoGeneticist]

Calia let Theofilus cling to her, making no effort or movement to push him away. She continued to absently stroke at his head, as she had done so many times for their children whenever they felt alone or scared. Her family meant the world to her.

Asha squealed, delighted, nosing eagerly at his hand and pawing at it happily. Calia smiled at the little girl, pulling her a little closer. "Don't be,[/b]" she replied, shaking her head slowly as she clutched his hand. "Theofilus... You're a person. You deserve a break every once in a while, it's just too much to handle otherwise.[/b]" she inhaled deeply, closing her eyes thoughtfully. "Kelasia and I can take care of things, love. I'm sure Rogers can help us out a bit, too, and Zane and Mori are always so helpful.[/b]" she smiled to herself. They had raised such wonderful, caring children. She was sure that the two of them would be able to help.

The sparrow listened to him quietly, running her thumb over his fingers. She nodded slowly. "I understand, Theofilus. Really. Take all the time you need. And... If you can't get through something on your own, please, just... I'll be here for you.[/b]"

[Kari Muffin]

Theofilus sighed and smiled at Calia. "Thank the heavens above that we have a big family. I'm very glad that we have one more to add." He briefly let go of Caila's hand to pet Asha's head, she seemed quite happy. Hopefully she would stay happen as long as she could.

"Is there anything I can do for you Calia?" Theofilus looked up from the cooing Asha. "You've been sick this whole time, and you've barely been able to do anything for yourself. If there's anything you want or need now would be the time to tell me about it. I also have to say it's embarrassing that I forgot the flowers I bought for you." He blushed under his feathers slightly. In all of the rush he had forgotten quite a bit. A small change of subject couldn't hurt either.

[carcinoGeneticist]

"She'll fit wonderfully, Theofilus, just wait and see.[/b]" Calia smiled. To say that Asha seemed happy would be an understatement. At this moment, nuzzling into the sparrow's hand, she looked positively radiant. Her squeaks and squeals filled the room with joy, though Calia couldn't help but feel sad every time she caught a glimpse of the black marking on her chest or the milky coat that shimmered over her eyes.

At his words, Calia looked up at him, pulled away from her inner turmoil. She had been sick, hadn't she? With Asha's sudden arrival into the world, Calia had almost managed to forget her own body's needs, and as the excitement faded she just felt... Tired. She wished that Kel was here now... She would need help from the baby's other parent soon enough. "S-something to eat would be lovely,[/b]" she replied, smiling gratefully. She was hungry, under the exhaustion. "And I want the rest of the family to meet her...[/b]" with that, she scratched at the little skunk's chin.

[Kari Muffin]

"The first request I can mange rather quickly," Theofilus said as he stood up, trying his hardest to keep a smile on his face. He could still feel the sadness that lingered in the room. Most of it was probably his own anyway. The sparrow walked out of the room to find the nurse that had been attending to Calia. She apparently found it appropriate to listen in on their whole conversation.

Theofilus raised his brow at her embarrassed expression. "Well, since you were listening to our private conversation, could you kindly find Calia some food?"

"Y-yes sir!" She muttered before scurrying off.

The sparrow sighed as he reentered the room. Now to attend to the second matter. "I think they can wait to meet her until later in the day. I have no idea where Kelasia is though. I know she had errands to do for the courts, but I can't imagine they took her this long." Theofilus moved back to sit on the bed. "But is there anything else I can do for you?"

[carcinoGeneticist]

Calia grinned to herself as she listened to Theofilus speak with the nurse, lightly brushing her hands over the skunk's head, wondering as the little girl burbled and grinned her funny little toothless grin. She was such a good baby, so quiet and gentle. Calia was relieved by that. She didn't know what she would do if Asha was a crier like Mori had been...

The skunk latched onto one of her fingers, pulling it into her mouth and sucking at it cheerfully. Calia found herself continuing to stroke her little head, wondering to herself if she would one day grow a mane as her daughters had done. After all, Kelasia had a mane as well. She was such a beautiful girl, and she couldn't wait for the skunk to meet her. Kel was such a kind woman, Calia was sure that she would be accepting of their little girl.

As Theofilus entered the room again, Calia looked up from Asha, still grinning to herself. "I'm sure she'll be home soon.[/b]" she replied with a nod. Maybe when she returned, she could have some time with her new daughter, and then they could bring Asha to the rest of the family to meet. As soon as Theofilus had moved close once more, Calia snuggled up to him, tucking her head in against his neck and looking down at the baby in her arms. "Can you just keep us company for a little while? If there's anything else you want to talk about... I'm all ears. I want to help you like you've done for me.[/b]"

[Kari Muffin]

The sparrow sighed happily. "I'm more than willing to stay with you until you kick me out." He wrapped an arm around her as he spoke. He was happy to be with her and Asha. He was happy to be with family period. Sometimes he had to wonder if work was going to be merciful or not and let him see them for an extend period of time.

"Did I tell you what happened in the Lowlands?" He suddenly asked. He couldn't remember what he had told her and what he hadn't. He just knew he explained that it was a nightmare. "I think... Eilwyn is never going to recover from it. As hard as I try I can't tell him what happened to his mother, and I don't think he would believe me either way." It suddenly hit Theofilus that he had never told anyone who Eilwyn's mother was, and what happened to her. Was he even brave enough to bring it up?